I have invested in a slightly more professional  look this year .

– I bought ……..

– A small , modern, comfortable, economical car , equiped with good AC and a smartphone plugin for listening  to podcasts on my long journeys .

– Expensive comfortable new shoes.

– Chanel suit.

– Cashmere cardigans.

– Sisley and Chanel perfume and make-up.

– A good haircut.

– A nice small airport suitcase.

Consequently  I arrive at the venues , not only ” looking the part” but “feeling it too.”

After all….. we are in France!

I have performed hundreds of ceremonies and there isn’t much you could throw at me these days which would destabilise me  ……

so ………….armed with my “feeling good  look” and after a beautiful two and a half hour drive up to the Dordogne yesterday  I arrive at http://www.chateau-hotel-dordogne.com/fr/restaurant-brantome-perigueux   to perform Amy and Mike’s ceremony.

I find a nice place to park in the shade of a tree . Even though there are a few rain clouds about  I was sure it was going to be another sweltering afternoon. It is  a bit nippy though so I slip  my lovely grey cardigan on , grab  my amplification gear , a printed copy of the ceremony, the bag of ribbons and head for the ceremony area which is still being  prepared by the florist.

I greet  a few of the guests  who are  milling about and find the busy Chateau manager who tells me where I can find  the bride who’s getting ready up stairs.

I knock on the door and am welcomed into the room by the usual troop of pretty women all getting ready for the ceremony. The only man in the room is the  photographer who’s busy clicking  away. The bride is having her make up done. Bridesmaids are tweaking  each other’s  dresses and I’m welcomed into the picture by the mother of the bride who’s already perfectly ready and composed .

I do my thing,……….chat to everyone,  make sure I can pronounce all the names correctly, know who’s doing the readings and wander round the room ( feeling chic ) trying not to get in people’s way.

The mother of the bride doesn’t move, smile or get involved in conversation. She sits there taking everything in and quietly observes . I feel  slightly uneasy …

I wonder around the room for a good half hour trying to cut through a strange atmosphere which reminds me of walking into a room where one is  convinced everyone’s been talking about you and they’re all a bit messed up by your presence.

What am I worried about? I don’t even know these people, I must be imagining it. They are all just nervous …..I tell them they all look gorgeous and leave the room and head  upstairs to find the groom to discuss the ipod and the ring exchange.

I return  to the ladie’s room to  rehearse  a reading with Lily an 8 year old bridesmaid.  I am kneeling down on the floor next to her when the mother of the bride gets up from her chaise-longue and walks silently over to me and whispers in my ear…….

” You’ve put your  cardigan on inside- out Dear “.

Bang goes my chic-ness ! I had blown my cover ! The label says  C&A in huge letters and no amount of Chanel No5 is  going to redeem my image ……..

Never mind …..

I perform a great ceremony ( even though I say it myself) .

I was possibly  even more determined to prove my worth as a celebrant  after that!

I’ll add some photos to this blog when I receive them from the couple.

Have a nice day 🙂